Both my grandparents and aunt & uncle own next door trailers on a small fishing lake, near Terre Haute, Ind. My mom & stepdad bought my grandparents trailer last fall, so we all decided to go down there over Memorial Day weekend. Though we've been eating fish out of that lake for almost 20 years, this was the first time in probably over 5 years that almost all our family has been down there at the same time: parents, siblings, aunt & uncle, cousins - just not our grandparents or one other cousin this time.

Caught almost a dozen fish over the weekend, most keepers, and I'll go ahead and brag - a bass that was the biggest caught over the weekend. Baylee and I went on her first boat ride and she helped me fish some. She fearlessly held both a worm and a fish. We all stayed up around the fire till past midnight talking & laughing, and also partook in the family tradition of playing Phase 10.

Tuesday before we left I was on the dock with Baylee for a last time. While basking in how much fun the weekend had been and also reminicing of other times standing on the same dock, a real weight came on me: the weight of time. I didn't realize how heavy something could be that you can't hold in your hand.

The weight of the past. All of my memories of the trailer are positive and special, and they bring me immense joy thinking about them. But what was heavy to me is what is obvious: I can't relive many of them. Sure I can still fish down there again...but never again with my grandpa. I dropped my glasses in the lake this past weekend...but it wasn't the same hilarious family experience as when my grandpa did it years ago. It's the same when you're remembering life after you see high school, college, or old church friends on Facebook. How many times in our lives have we been in a moment with friends or family and thought, "I hope this moment never ends." Yeah, they all did. You just can't TIVO the past, rewind & relive...and knowing that to be true doesn't mean it doesn't suck any less.

The weight of the future. Driving home up 41, sharing with Jeannette about being on the dock with Baylee, we started talking about the future as well. We'll be 50 when Baylee is 18, 60 when she's 28. I want more time with her than that! Only God knows if we'll even have that much time with her. It's a pretty heavy thought to wonder if someday you'll get to hold your 2 year old's 2 year old.

All this heaviness wasn't/shouldn't be about saddness, for me it was about necessary clarity.

I've been waking up earlier these last couple days to get to my work and get it done, so I can be home a little earlier. A two year old who doesn't want to go to bed hasn't been that big of a deal. Still frustrating, but a frustration that I know I need to cherish.

Like pressure on coal to make a diamond, the weight of the past & future give the necesary focus needed for the present.

From a drive I had late at night last week, the below Chris Rice song has been stuck in my head. Didn't know I'd be grasping it's message over Memorial Day weekend, as it pretty much encompasses what hit me on the dock standing there with Baylee:

Life Means So Much:
Everyday is a journal page
Every man holds a quill and ink
And there’s plenty of room for writing in
All we do and believe and think
So will you compose a curse
Or will today bring the blessings
Fill the page with rhyming verse
Or some random sketchings

Teach us to count the days
Teach us to make the days count
Lead us in better ways
Somehow our souls forgot
Life means so much
Life means so much
Life means so much

Everyday is a bank account
And time is our currency
So no one’s rich, nobody’s poor
We get twenty-four hours each
So how are you gonna spend
Will you invest or squander
Try to get ahead
Or help someone who’s under

Has anybody lived who knew the value of a life?
And don’t you think giving his own
Would prove the worth of yours and mine?

Teach us to count the days
Teach us to make the days count
Lead us in better ways
Somehow our souls forgot
Life means so much
Life means so much
Life means so much

Con solamente algunos años de ministrar a las vidas de la gente, en nuestra localización de Midway, Dios ha formado a una familia asombrosa.  Mientras que nos familiarizamos con la gente de la comunidad, detectamos la urgencia para buscar a dios de una manera aún más intensa.  He observado cómo la gente ha aprendido adorar de una manera ardiente.  También he observado cómo son responsivos a la palabra.  Es tan móvil ver crecimiento en las vidas de la gente del dios.  Una de nuestras oraciones es que Dios nos de la revelación y la sabiduría como conducir a su gente en una relación más íntima y más profunda con El.  

      Un desafío es la necesidad de sirvientes y líderes que se levantan a la ocasión.  “La cosecha está listo pero los trabajadores son poco” Lucas 10:2.  

      Mientras compartamos nuestros corazones, deseamos hacer un énfasis que ha habido gran alegría, paz, y entusiasmo que ha llenado la atmósfera dentro de cada una de nuestras celebraciones.  Por favor ayúdanos en orar que Dios triga a gente indicada para hacer parte de nuestra misión.

Hará poco más de tres años yo era una persona rebelde a todo lo que fuera relacionado con religión. Mi esposa en cambio, había estado buscando grupos en los que se estudiara la Palabra de Dios y en los que ella se sintiera cómoda y a la vez, donde pudiera aprender.

    Al regreso de los servicios religiosos a los que asistía, ella trataba de comentar conmigo algún pasaje bíblico, algún versículo o alguna escritura en la que se basara el estudio de ese día, pero yo estaba negativo a todo lo que fuera religión, no quería saber nada de nada y mucho menos escuchar que me hablaran de Dios o de iglesia. A mí que me dejaran tranquilo con mi bebida "espirituosa", mi cigarrillo y mi televisión.

    Había alquilado yo un apartamento grande y me sobrara una recámara, la cual acondicioné para poner ahí mi barra, un equipo de sonido y una televisión con su respectivo VCR (en ese tiempo no exisatían todavía los DVDs) y ese era mi templo en donde me encerraba y hasta me quedaba dormido, tanto así que una noche, cuando celebraba yo sólo mi cumpleaños número sesentitantos, se me cayó un cigarrillo al piso, me agaché a levantarlo y cuando me enderecé, mi cabeza pegó contra el filo de la barra, perdiendo el conocimiento durante no sé cuántas horas y donde me encontró mi esposa la mañana siguiente, en el suelo y en medio de un charco de sangre. Ella me llevó al hospital donde recibí más de una docena de puntos de sutura en la cabeza. Ese fue el final de la celebración a la que no invité a nadie, pues "no quería gorrones" que se bebieran mi licor. Y no crean que ese "accidente" me detuvo; no, seguí bebiendo, seguí fumando y seguí rechazando al Señor.

    ¿Qué sucedió dentro de mí? Yo no sé, no podría explicarlo. Lo que sí puedo decir a boca llena, es que sentí la necesidad de acercarme a Dios, hoy día llevo más de tres años que no tomo alcohol ni siquiera en jarabe para la tos y llevo más de 6 meses sin probar un cigarrillo, hace más de dos años asisto regularmente a la Iglesia Comunidad Nueva Vida de Melrose Park y cada día me dan ganas de aprender más y más acerca de Dios. No cabe duda que El cambió mi vida. Entonces tengo que reconocer que no es el destino, es la mano de Dios que nos guía por el sendero que El nos ha marcado de antemano.

      With only a few months into ministering to the lives of people, at our Berwyn location, God has formed an amazing family.  As we get to know the people of the community, we sense the urgency to seek God in an even more intense manner.  I have observed how people have learned to worship in a zealous way.  I have also observed how they are responsive to the word.  It is so moving to see growth in the lives of God's people.  One of our prayers is for revelation and wisdom to lead his people into a more intimate and profound relationship with him. 

      A current challenge we are facing is the need for servants and leaders to rise to the occasion.  “For the harvest is vast, but the workers are few” Luke 10:2.

      As we share our hearts, we want to make an emphasis that there has been great joy, peace, and enthusiasm that has filled the atmosphere within each of our celebrations.  Please join us in prayer that God would bring those indicated people to become part of our mission to further the kingdom of God.  

The women of Nueva Vida Midway & New Life Berwyn have recently returned from a Bilingual Women’s Retreat. It was amazing to say the very least.  There is nothing like a group of women getting together to worship, and adore God.  It was a powerful weekend of change, growth, and spiritual saturation. 

The word of the weekend was Zapatos or Shoes. The reason was because sometimes we become complacent in our situation, instead of getting our shoes on and walking out of it we sit in the ashes of our past. For whatever reason we refuse to allow God to renew us, and instead we just stay in our past.  We need to remember that we are called by God to get up, get our shoes on, and get moving. 

Just as every shoe is different; gym shoe, flat, small heel, high heal, so too is every situation.  My past issue may not be your past issue, but we need to arise from the ashes, and walk away from the past that haunts us. 

I don’t believe there was a woman that came back from the retreat unchanged. Not only loving God a little bit more, but also loving themselves just a little bit more.  Self-hatred is one of Satan’s greatest tools, and convincing us that we are no better than where we came from is a powerful weapon in incapacitating us.  However, the retreat caused the women of Nueva Vida Midway & New Life Berwyn reclaim their status of Daughter of the most high.  We are no longer captive to our past; we have grabbed our shoes, and walked away.  We are standing on the hill proclaiming that we are Daughters of Zion.

If you are in a place where you feel unable to move beyond your past, please visit one of our locations. Let us pray with you.  Let us help you get your shoes on, and get moving!

Screaming out Zapatos,

Melissa

A question I get periodically was asked again last night, "How do you read so many books?" The simplest explanation is that I love to read, it's one of my favorite things to do. Beyond that though, here's some practical things that might help someone read more:

- Pick books you'll enjoy. What might seem like a "duh" is actually a big reason why, I think, people don't enjoy reading: the books they've read aren't enjoyable to them. Maybe your high school teacher wouldn't let up on Shakespeare and you just abhorred it, so you have this nervous twitch that kicks in whenever you see any book because you're afraid of "to be or not to be." Reading isn't supposed to feel like a homework assignment, it's something that's meant to be enjoyed. Leave the wounds from your high school English teacher in the past and find a book YOU want to read because YOU'RE choosing to read it.

- Think correctly about reading. Reading is not a mere leisure activity. For some reading is actually part of their work's training/development. Obviously you shouldn't read for the whole day, and equally important, you should have your boss' approval. But to take a short block of time each day or a couple times a week should actually be expected and shouldn't bring a false sense of guilt that you are wasting time. It's called sharpening your skills. If you're in ministry, read books about ministry; if you're a teacher, read books about teaching; and so on.

- Make time for it. If you want to read more then you have to establish some type of rhythm in your week for when you are going to read. If I'm not having lunch with anyone then I read while I'm eating, I also read later at night when the rest of the family goes to bed. For you it might be cutting out a TV show, early in the morning, or an hour at a coffeeshop in the evening. But if it takes time to read then you have to make the time.

- Carry a book with you all the time. How often do you wait in line? How often do you wait period? I hate wasting time, and awhile back I figured out that it was my choice whether waiting time became wasted time. I started carrying a paperback around with me wherever I went. A few pages can be read while waiting in line at the grocery story and probably a whole chapter sitting in the doctor's office. If you ride the train a lot in Chicago then you're being handed blocks of time to read - so why not have a book with you? Don't waste time staring at walls or the back of peoples' heads when you could get through some pages.

- Listen to Audio books. How often you wait in line is one thing, but think about how much time you spend in the car, especially if you commute. To not get stressed out in gridlock I began listening to unabridged audiobooks. Unabridged means that someone is reading a novel word for word as it is in the hardcopy of the book. If I'm alone in the car I have an audiobook on, and I probably listen to two a month on average. A lot of libraries have unabridged books on CD that you can check out. I get mine through a subscription to audbile.com.

- Read a variety of things. Read fiction and read non-fiction, read older authors and read newer authors, read authors whose ideas you agree with and also those whose you don't. Book options shouldn't be treated like the same old menu item you resort to - books are like a buffet: the options change all the time and you can take whatever you want. I'm going to blog about this another time, but I don't think it's beneficial to only read one particular type of book. Balance is the key. At any given time I have a non-fiction book (normally what I read during the day) and a fiction book (read at night) that I'm reading (plus my audio book).

- Connect and discuss with others. When you run into someone who is or has read the same book you've read it can bring about an amazing conversation. Shared observations, insights, and meaninful reflections make it more than just a a good book you've read - it becomes a deeper connection with another person. Plus, if you are stuck as to what to read the best place to start is to ask someone what good books they've read. Just seeing them on the shelf I probably would have never read any books by Orson Scott Card. But, a friend of mine who knows I like fantasy highly recommended him to me and explained why he liked his books so much. Since that conversation a few years ago I've probably read over 15 books by Card and he's now one of my favorite authors.

Other than the above, the only other really big thing I could say is that you need to make reading your own thing. Don't compare your reading preferences and speed to others. I read on average 50 books a year and from a wide variety of topics and authors. I know of some people who read more than me and some who read less. Regardless, none of that should matter to you. If you only read 1 book a month that is AWESOME! Connect with others because of books, but don't think you have to become others. Just read, and enjoy it.

So go buy a good book and find some time to enjoy it. If you need ideas, the books I'm reading, have recently read, and my favorites are on the left side of the blog a little ways down.

A question I get periodically was asked again last night, "How do you read so many books?" The simplest explanation is that I love to read, it's one of my favorite things to do. Beyond that though, here's some practical things that might help someone read more:

- Pick books you'll enjoy. What might seem like a "duh" is actually a big reason why, I think, people don't enjoy reading: the books they've read aren't enjoyable to them. Maybe your high school teacher wouldn't let up on Shakespeare and you just abhorred it, so you have this nervous twitch that kicks in whenever you see any book because you're afraid of "to be or not to be." Reading isn't supposed to feel like a homework assignment, it's something that's meant to be enjoyed. Leave the wounds from your high school English teacher in the past and find a book YOU want to read because YOU'RE choosing to read it.

- Think correctly about reading. Reading is not a mere leisure activity. For some reading is actually part of their work's training/development. Obviously you shouldn't read for the whole day, and equally important, you should have your boss' approval. But to take a short block of time each day or a couple times a week should actually be expected and shouldn't bring a false sense of guilt that you are wasting time. It's called sharpening your skills. If you're in ministry, read books about ministry; if you're a teacher, read books about teaching; and so on.

- Make time for it. If you want to read more then you have to establish some type of rhythm in your week for when you are going to read. If I'm not having lunch with anyone then I read while I'm eating, I also read later at night when the rest of the family goes to bed. For you it might be cutting out a TV show, early in the morning, or an hour at a coffeeshop in the evening. But if it takes time to read then you have to make the time.

- Carry a book with you all the time. How often do you wait in line? How often do you wait period? I hate wasting time, and awhile back I figured out that it was my choice whether waiting time became wasted time. I started carrying a paperback around with me wherever I went. A few pages can be read while waiting in line at the grocery story and probably a whole chapter sitting in the doctor's office. If you ride the train a lot in Chicago then you're being handed blocks of time to read - so why not have a book with you? Don't waste time staring at walls or the back of peoples' heads when you could get through some pages.

- Listen to Audio books. How often you wait in line is one thing, but think about how much time you spend in the car, especially if you commute. To not get stressed out in gridlock I began listening to unabridged audiobooks. Unabridged means that someone is reading a novel word for word as it is in the hardcopy of the book. If I'm alone in the car I have an audiobook on, and I probably listen to two a month on average. A lot of libraries have unabridged books on CD that you can check out. I get mine through a subscription to audbile.com.

- Read a variety of things. Read fiction and read non-fiction, read older authors and read newer authors, read authors whose ideas you agree with and also those whose you don't. Book options shouldn't be treated like the same old menu item you resort to - books are like a buffet: the options change all the time and you can take whatever you want. I'm going to blog about this another time, but I don't think it's beneficial to only read one particular type of book. Balance is the key. At any given time I have a non-fiction book (normally what I read during the day) and a fiction book (read at night) that I'm reading (plus my audio book).

- Connect and discuss with others. When you run into someone who is or has read the same book you've read it can bring about an amazing conversation. Shared observations, insights, and meaninful reflections make it more than just a a good book you've read - it becomes a deeper connection with another person. Plus, if you are stuck as to what to read the best place to start is to ask someone what good books they've read. Just seeing them on the shelf I probably would have never read any books by Orson Scott Card. But, a friend of mine who knows I like fantasy highly recommended him to me and explained why he liked his books so much. Since that conversation a few years ago I've probably read over 15 books by Card and he's now one of my favorite authors.

Other than the above, the only other really big thing I could say is that you need to make reading your own thing. Don't compare your reading preferences and speed to others. I read on average 50 books a year and from a wide variety of topics and authors. I know of some people who read more than me and some who read less. Regardless, none of that should matter to you. If you only read 1 book a month that is AWESOME! Connect with others because of books, but don't think you have to become others. Just read, and enjoy it.

So go buy a good book and find some time to enjoy it. If you need ideas, the books I'm reading, have recently read, and my favorites are on the left side of the blog a little ways down.